If you have the pleasure to know me on my period then I feel sorry for you. I am not saying that I am unpleasant to have around but I am. It’s the hormones, the fact that my skin is my new nemesis and the tragedy of having gained water weight like a potato sack. It’s all very concerning.
But when you run your own business, have a dog-child, are trying to survive a long distance relationship and want to be sexy as fuck. There is no time to whine and more need to survive your period like a boss. Masturbate Like A Mofo
: I don’t know about you, but I need to fuck like an animal when I am approaching my-eggs-are-not-fertilized period. It’s completely natural to be a horn-dog on and around your period, hence thank you to Skype sex and Xvideos. You know I love you.
Don’t fall into the gloom-doom about eating a little extra while pmsing. It is a right of passage for all women to eat pizza on their period with extra cheese and no guilt. If your body is bleeding out, it’s only fair you feed that bad boy a little more. Just don’t eat food the weight of a mini-4 year old. You go it, dude?
Avoid All Humans
: I like to call my period time a mini hiatus, I work from home, I avoid my co-workers/friends and I don’t answer my phone unless it’s the Chinese delivery man. I know we all can’t do this every month but it’s fun to try. This is the best for everyone. Trust me.
Exercise, Exercise, Exercise!
: I am no exercise extraordinaire with zero ‘Fitness Friday’ hashtags on my Instagram. But I do have holidays planned for the summer and I am not going to let no bleeding vagina spoil my momentum. Plus, getting your ass kicked in the gym does help with menstrual pain. No pain, no gain. Where my 50 shades of Grey fans at?
Pamper Yourself: Massages, Shopping, Wine.
Naps And Netflix: I recommend hilarious movies like Sisters or amazing chick-flick TV shows like Younger to get you through any blue day. Watching hot, hysterical women in real life dilemmas is calming and helps you realize that if this boss-ass-bitch can do it then you can too!